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So, I broke down and took a HPT today. Negative…..

WHY??????

Ok, so I am not exactly sure that absolutely means I am not pregnant, and I will test again on Friday, but shouldn’t something show up on 12dpiui? I wanted to crawl into bed and not deal with the world after that, but oh well. I had to go to work.

On a happier note. We saw the latest episode of V and they showed the half-lizard, half-human baby.   It really looked quite normal except for the big tail swimming around in there. Yuck!

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V’s Crazy Ultrasounds

V

I was reading another infertility blog a few weeks ago and the topic of how media incorrectly reflects pregnancy is rampant came up (for the life of me I can’t remember whose blog I was reading, so there is no link, sorry).

Anyway, Hubby and I were catching up on the TV show V last night.  I love TV and I love DVR’s.  No more commercials!  Anyway, I digress.

SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!  If you are watching V and are not caught up yet, you may want to look away.

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So, it’s Monday.  Rather than count the minutes until I should take my HPT on Friday, I am focusing on my Progesterone symptoms.

I am taking a 200mg suppository of Prometrium once daily.  I just read that Prometrium is actually made from yam plants.  Seems to me it would be cheaper to just cut up some yams and supposit them…  Anyway, I was reflecting last week how I did not seem to have too many symptoms and was pleasantly surprised.  The only thing I really noticed was that I am breaking out everywhere….face, ears, back, butt, you name it there is probably a zit there.  Ick.  Well, on Saturday another symptom became apparent.

I wanted to kill everyone.

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Clomid Boost Cycle #1

When Dr. Blue told me we would go to daily injections, I freaked out a little.  I hate, hate needles.  Although throughout this journey, I have become less scared.  I still don’t watch the nurse take blood, but I don’t break out into cold sweats either.  I got my Follistim pen and took a look.  The Ovidrel trigger shot, I never even felt, so I was not too worried as the needles look pretty small.  It was not too bad.  If someone had told me a year ago I would be giving myself daily injections, I would have probably peed my pants I would’ve laughed so hard.  Now, I don’t even think about it.  How grown up am I?

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After making our appt, CCRM sent me a huge amount of paperwork to fill out.  It was like a book.  One question really stuck out.  “On a scale of 1-10 how stressed would you say you are?”.  I chose 8 as when I dwell on it, it was kinda stressful.  Not enough to make me hide in the dark, never leaving the house, but I felt stressed.  The next question was, “Have you ever seen a therapist about this stress?”.  What!  I think I should change my answer to the stress scale question.  No way did I feel stressed enough to see a therapist.  That was the first time I realized how relative peoples pain can be.  For me (whose life has been relatively easy), this was high on my stress scale.  Yet for others who maybe have had to deal with more heartache, this was easy.  It was something to think about.

I was definitely nervous going to our first appointment with the RE as I just had no idea what to expect.  Dr. Blue was incredibly kind and understanding.  He started out by telling us that with our history (from the book we had to fill out before our appt) our chances of conceiving each month was like 1 – 2%.  Jeez Doc, how encouraging!  He said that with my symptoms, I may have endometriosis or fibroids.  He also recommended that Hubby do a Semen Analysis.

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So, after taking a few months off of “trying” to get pregnant to let my body heal, we considered starting again. In the mean time, I had gotten a book recommendation from a friend.

She had used the advice in the book and managed to conceive in two months. Great, I thought. Maybe our timing was just off. So I started the adventure of taking my temperature every morning and checking cervical mucus levels. Man was this exciting. (I am starting to realize that since my humor of choice is sarcasm, it does not translate well in writing…..oh well).

NOTE TO HUBBY: Sorry about the mention of mucus before. It may get more graphic, so reader beware. . . (especially Hubby)

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I am not sure how many parts there will be to this “Discovery”, so let’s see how it goes, shall we?

My husband and I got married in 1999 when I was 21.  I could not have been happier.  We had decided that we would wait to start a family so that we could get used to each other and establish ourselves a little before taking on that responsibility.  I had always figured that by the time I was 30 we would start a family if we had not started sooner.  30 would be my cutoff.  After all, I would be WAY too old to start later than that…..oh how naive the young are.

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